TERF Lesbians are Just Female Incels
an essay by Daphne
TERF Lesbians are Just Female Incels
an essay by Daphne
To the TERF lesbians who see themselves right to claim manhood and femininity — all at the same time — but exclude trans women from having a place to exist within lesbian culture as anything other than placated but ridiculed doormats: how has Female is the Future been going for you politically?
How does it feel like leaving me to become your enemy will go in the future?
Oh… yeah, I guess your ideology doesn’t work right; when there are levels of language and thought which you are failing to acknowledge, and men in power can easily convince the masses you are insane by simply pointing out your blatant hypocrisy.
I’m not sorry… now you have a trans woman doing that too. And while she is (I am) angry that your lies have destroyed her mental health and livelihood, she only wants to help.
I’m a warrior of intelligence and spiritual leadership which is here to take back the right of honest emotions bearing a place in culture. The denial of my ideas place within the canon of acceptability in liberalism is a shame of a sham which serves no one. I will not become a republican just because thinking freely and expressing my honest beliefs makes some people see me that way — those people aren’t honest either.
Let’s get into my take on the language of transness, and why widely propagated liberal thought doesn’t serve us in that regard.
To me; the conflation of male with man, and female with woman into equally synonymous concepts is some greatest travesty of literacy. I believe in the idea, once taught to me by an English professor, as sex being what you arere born with, gender being the container you identify and express your personality with.
How I see it: I am a male woman.
How I will speak for abiding the tides of culture: I’m a tans person, a self-identified female and woman (because those words are the same now), who needs an overlong but obvious conversation with all doctors I work with.
Something to note: Even though it’s obvious for me personally, as a giant who makes no effort to hide her transness; it’s not obvious for all trans people, and language should abide the tides of need for everyone as best it can at once.
So… I am a female and that is my gender/sex. I am also a woman and that is my sex/gender. I am also trans—which is only a reality needed for discussion with my medical practitioners.
While I understand the conflated language is affirming and, on some level, makes me feel nice — I am not treated as a female or a woman by anyone but a rarest (nearly impossible to find) breed. Even with those folks, their language slips because of superficial expectations I often fail to meet.
To me… I’d rather us be honest and figure out why trans women who aren’t fully stealth in a visual sense get especially derogatory treatment from all sides.
My belief: it has to do with cisgendered women disliking my true and wholistic inclusion, in a blanket sense, that men are just into owning what a woman is because they often carry entitlement over the bodies and minds of females. Cisgendered men see me, and they don’t want to own me, or they do but are ashamed, and that creates an anger thrust upon me. The same happens for cisgendered women.
Why I believe this: the most holistically affirming people I meet are usually men without ownership complexes over women, who aren’t gay and projecting a vision of trans women as permanent cross-dressers; or kind young women who do not have interest in me and also unintimidated by my presence.
On a separate but related note; America has large problems right now.
Issue One — Immigration rights are under attack in the United States, and I believe that is a fight for everyone.
Issue Two — Reproductive rights of cisgendered females are under attack in the United States, and I believe that is a fight for everyone.
Issue Three — Trans rights are under attack in the United States, and I believe that is a fight for everyone.
(There are plenty more)
The focus on issue one is overwhelming the attention needed on issues two and three; we’re going mad for the impossibility of the horrors we face. Still, destroying trans women is the literal platform the republican party ran on: we are being detransitioned in prisons across the country and the least fighting is being done for us.
Why am I so grumpy?
Well, it’s the TERF lesbian women with double standards who police free thought and language which is too mean; because they don’t care about issue two and are going full propogandist on issue one; because they need constant validation from each other and the liberal thought paradigm of convincing people that engagement with frustration makes you a good person.
My honest belief on immigration: If people have been working here, they should be made citizens. It’s okay to create stricter immigration standards but we cannot be inhuman to the people who have and will continue contributing to our country.
My honest belief on abortion rights (hot button issue of reproductive rights): I find nothing more despicable than people shaming women going into clinics to make the toughest decision of their lives.
Why I believe trans women are left out: There is a rarest person who is fighting for their community; nobody in America truly considers trans women a part of their community. We’re seen as invaders everywhere.
There is nothing kinder to me than someone being honest.
It is kindness, to me, for a cisgendered woman to be honest about how she doesn’t see me as a true woman — or whatever — as long as she can respect me as the delicate creature I am.
There is nothing kinder to me then that rarest breed who seeks to accept me wholistically, because they have a hint of understanding towards the struggle of transgender women; who can admit they don’t really see it the same but still believes I have every right to teach them by my honest reflection and will work to do their best at treating me with the respect they offer women.
To be clear, that rarest breed does not exist. True feelings and beliefs of those who include me go forever unspoken.
I am often treated with worse than secondary levels of care and compassion within circles of women. My own voice of the truth — expressions of my experience — are seemingly unwanted and often silenced by overt attempts to gaslight me by cisgendered women. Compliance to the way things are seems demanded by the liberal cisgendered women in my life; clearly wishing I accept them as some kind of half-breed liar-TERF who is being nice about language but doesn’t really care about the truth of my life. I’m most traumatized by their constant disregard.
Those people who refuse to speak it plainly what they think and feel are unkind. They are disrespectful, even if less so than the bigoted folks who speak their honest opinion while believing it a decree.
Kindness and respect are about two things to me: honesty, and the willingness to learn from another.
Nobody is less honest about what they feel, to my face — regarding trans women — than cisgendered lesbians. Why? Because they are in a club of hatred which is not allowed to be spoken of; about male born people being lesser; a projection of trauma no-doubt.
To speak of this paradigm has that class of liberal woman paint one as a conservative man, most often, who is jealous and some abusive incel to the estimation of their overt projections; even if you’re a trans woman. It triggers gaslighting to hide the untruth which riddles the psyche of a sex essentialist practitioner of lesbianism.
Trans people everywhere who know their existence as a simple human reality reject the term ‘transgenderism’. As someone who sees the existence of women who love women as a simple human reality; I reject the term ‘lesbianism’. I find those who don’t fight that fight in the lesbian community while understanding the literacy quite curious.
Lesbianism is a cancer of sex based (male & female biological reality of birthed bodies) bigotry. It’s an ideology which wishes to hide the fact it views all males with an insecure complex of insane hatred; denying people the right to even use the word misandry without culturally enforced ridicule.
It’s a recruitment hub for young women to be subsidized into the thought paradigms which have them hating men, males, and trans women outright. And behind closed doors, within that community, I can only imagine the things which are told about a woman like me. The glowers and glares I receive for existing with an ugly face and an immaculate — yet large — feminine body are enough to make some things clear.
I’m hated for the privilege of being male; another projection wielded most by the cisgendered incel-women in a cult about their genitals.
Except they cannot say that, not in the open. So, I’m left to watch the lesbians I would wish to be friends with — who make it clear they appreciate my energy and heartful resonance of womanhood — become shamed to have been associated with me.
I had one person who treated like a woman in secret, literally, tell me, “We didn’t even know each other, you’re just insane. Go away,” as if their phone was bugged by lesbianism’s overlords.
Mind you, this is a lesbian that has a mother who will not even acknowledge her partners as more than ‘friends,’ and I am severely disabled. Also, I fucked that trans boy like nobody else ever had; and she told me that, literally, before boozing it away and crawling back into the arms of a woman they explained over-again — to my face — as an emotionally coercive monster who treated them like trash for having addiction struggles.
Their friends are cisgendered men and women and presumably hate a woman like me for being something he inside she wants. The lesbian they lay with; I can only presume finds means to reject talking about it outright, or are a genuinely open TERF, because the language is too difficult for navigating without stepping on the toes of someone… Also, I’m an inverse to their coercive target’s earnestly expressed trans masculinity.
I see TERF lesbian culture as a conglomeration of liars who are insecure. The denial of my inclusion in a way that is healthy, for even friendship and support, and the disallowance for me to be a person whose art is heard and respected —denied every grace others might receive — reeks of cisgendered incel-women (closeted/traumatized straight women) grooming trans masculine people to be nothing but secretive sex essentialist monsters of lesbianism.
I’m pansexual beneath my trauma. I’m asexual because I’ve now been explicitly abused by everyone from all sides to the extreme.
Still, I’m almost exclusively attracted to women; I will seek to date women when I have the chance — with a badge of asexuality — so they know it’s about companionship I’m seeking (not to be used and discarded again). A man could woo me with kindness and respectful patience regarding the trauma I have around male pheromones, although, he’d have to be both angel-hearted and of mighty physicality. For my earnest attraction to men is about those of embodied strength and heartful willpower.
What it seems I have to do is pray for the right cute nerdy literature-woman (or gentle trans-masculine creature) to come along; one who wants to have fun liking nerdy things with me and doesn’t care what the mean old lesbian incels think. Also — now that I’ve been extremely disabled by queer women and trans masculine folks — I must wait for somebody that finds my disability sweet and has tenderness to spare for someone like me.
I’ll be waiting…
Daphne
